Searching for the White Rabbit

I really cannot do this shit anymore. Im sick of people being disappointed in me and verbalising their views on me being a screw up. Its just plain mean. Im sick of crying every day and having no one to yalk to. No one really cares and its not fair. Im always there for people anytime. I've text god knows how many people today and no one has even bothered to text me back. Fuck im so emotional its ridiculous. Jethros in jail and i miss him so much. More than i thought i would actually. Its really hard. Too much is going on in my life at the moment and its wearing me down more and more every day. If i wasnt pregnant id be contemplating topping myself i swear. God i complain alot. I just cant help myself. At least i have a stupid blog i can talk to. Yay how loved am i. Pity it cant talk back and give me a hug. I'd love a hug right now. It really is all too hard.